Patrick Martin Renfro

Patrick Martin Renfro October 15, 1947 - January 9, 2014 I Have fought the good fight, I have finished the race. I have kept the faith 2 Timothy 4:7 Patrick passed away Thursday, January 9, 2014, following a battle with Renal Cell Carcinoma. He died at his home in Conifer, Colorado, as he wished, surrounded by his family: his wife of 41 years; Linda Renfro, his son and daughter-in-law; Sean and Crystal Renfro, his daughter; Heather Nassimbene, and his 5 grandchildren; Kayla Hollopeter, Egor Renfro, Aleksandr Renfro, Nadia Renfro, and Denny Renfro. Patrick will also be missed by his mother; Martha Renfro, sister; Cindy Cartwright and son-in-law; Michael Nassimbene. Patrick joined the United States Army in 1970, becoming a member of the Medical Corp, Nursing Branch. He was stationed at California State University Fresno in order to obtain a degree in nursing. Having earned a Bachelor's Degree, Patrick was assigned to Fitzsimons Army Medical Center in 1973. He specifically worked with Orthopedic Patients returning from Viet Nam. During the evacuation of Vietnamese Refugees, Patrick was sent to Indiantown Gap, Pennsylvania, to care for arriving refugees. After over 20 years of Active and Reserve Duty, he retired from the Army as a Lieutenant Colonel. Patrick loved teaching and mentoring. Patrick was a professor at the University of Phoenix. For 26 years, he taught many Nursing and Business Management Courses, including: Nursing Theory, Nutrition, and Nursing Administration. In March of 2000, Patrick founded Rehabilitation Consulting Services which continues to be a viable company within the world of Forensic Rehab and Life Care Planning. He was passionate about his profession and was always eager to testify. He will be greatly missed by his family, friends, and colleagues. And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, Who have been called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28 Hi, I am Patrick's wife, Linda. A couple of weeks before our wedding, my younger sister said to me, ""This will never work"". Having reached the wise old age of 21 and ""being in love, I thought she was a 19 year old idiot. Patrick and I ""came of age during a time of cultural revolution and turmoil, the rules were changing if you even believed that there should be any rules at all. The standard of dress of wearing skirts or dresses and shirts and ties to class became jeans and barefoot, Hot pants and mini-skirts were all the rage. The optimism and innocence of the music of the 50's was giving way to the turmoil of the 60's reflecting the cultural revolution of the times. Bob Dylan's ""The Times They Are a Changing"" epitomized the decade. It was a time of Viet Nam, Haight-Ashbury, Woodstock, the Civil Rights Movement and Protest. The rules were changing so quickly often with the attitude that rules and any type of structure and standards were obsolete. It was exciting but with all the standard anchors gone discovering who you were as in individual and where to put your faith was very difficult. It was a time of confusion hidden under an almost arrogant sense of confidence. Years later, having actually achieved some wisdom and having a son and daughter nearing adulthood, I could see the practical insight of my sister's opinion. Patrick and I only knew each other 5 months before we married. At the time our reasoning seemed logical to us. In a year he would be transferred by the Army thousands of miles away if not half-way around the world to Viet-Nam. Didn't it make sense to get married right away and have a year together close to home and family before being moved? In retrospect, it could quite simply be summed up that: ""We got married so quickly in order to get to know each other better"". My sister's comment - that our relationship and marriage wouldn't work out - was laden with reality and truth. Patrick and I were very different people in terms of personality, temperament, and opinions. Patrick loved to hear himself talk and never knew when to shut-up, his philosophy and motto being that ""If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull-shit. I was painfully shy, and only spoke after having thoroughly reflected upon what I was going to say. Patrick thought ""credit"" was the next best thing to sliced bread. I believed you should save until you can afford to buy what you want. Patrick was a Republican, voting for Nixon. I voted for McGovern. The list went on and on. It shouldn't have worked. What my sister failed to recognized was that: both Patrick and I at the cores of our beings shared a belief and commitment that would always be the glue of our relationship. Both of us, years before having met, had accepted Jesus as our Savior and shared a common desire to follow and serve God. So, at that small church in Fresno, California, in 1972, we took a vow before God pledging ourselves to one another, believing that there were three entities in our marriage; God, Patrick and Myself. Through 41 years of marriage, we didn't always remember that or practice that to the best of our abilities, but that belief was the foundation or our marriage. Accepting Jesus does not automatically make us perfect. It only makes us perfect in the ""Eyes of God"". The hard work comes after accepting Jesus, the goal to become more and more Christ-Like. A journey of always remaining flawed and broken but a willingness to be open to God's guidance and having a desire to grow to become all that He created us to be. In 1972, we began that journey together. Although I refused to vow to Obey and entertained the thought of keeping my maiden name (after all the Women's Movement had begun), We vowed to each other to Love and to Cherish in Sickness and in Health for Richer or Poorer and headed into the unknown, with the assurance that God would never fail us. Throughout our marriage we have been on many journeys, including both times of trials and struggle and great joy and wonder. But what I would like to share with you today is our final journey together, Patrick God and Myself. Twenty-one months ago, Patrick received a dreadful diagnosis of Stage 4 Renal Cell Cancer with a dire prognosis. With both of us having a medical background in Nursing, there was no denying the seriousness of what we were being told. As a patient having medical knowledge and experience is a two edged sword, on the positive side; you are able to talk and understand the medical lingo, you know the appropriate questions to ask and are capable of participating in medical decisions. The negative side is; you know too much; you know where the road is taking you long before you have time to accept where you now find yourself. We needed a Landmark, an anchor to take hold of. Our Foundation was firm, we knew where to turn: Romans 8:28: And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. Terminal Cancer is not a ""good thing"" but in the midst times of trials and tribulation such as terminal cancer, God is there reminding us that He is has not abandoned us. For those of us who have accepted his gift of Jesus Christ and are willing to follow Him, He gives us Hope and Security that if we are willing to look at this time of fear and despair accepting it as an opportunity to grow closer to Him, Our trial will ultimately be one for our own good, by deepening our relationship with him. This became our anchor, this became His promise that we clung to believing and demanding that he keep His promise. From the beginning there were many decisions to be made: Should we close the business or try to keep it going, not knowing how quickly the cancer might spread. There were pros and cons to both, neither being better or worse than the other. We pled with and railed to God; ""Tell us which way to go, give us a sign"". There was nothing, until God whispered: ""Pick a Path, Start walking, I will take care of the rest"". And so we did. Against all odds, RCS has continued and will continue to be a viable company. The final decision during our journey was whether Patrick would discontinue treatment and begin Hospice Care. This was an extremely difficult decision for Patrick. It was his Gethsemane struggle. Intellectually, he knew that there were no viable treatments and that no matter what he did medically; the outcome would be the same. Emotionally, he was devastated and frustrated as he came to the realization that he was finally facing something that he could not think or talk his way out of. His fear was not of dying but what death would temporarily bring. His fear was that of saying good-bye to all those he loved and would for the time being be separated from. But, his desire was to pass away at home with those he loved most. So, the decision was made. Patrick loved life. He loved eating; he gave directions by using Restaurants as Landmarks. He loved talking; often it seemed as if he would never tire of his own voice. He loved being in the Military; He took great pleasure and satisfaction from his time of Service. He loved Teaching and Mentoring. He loved his work; He looked forward to testifying with eagerness and anticipation. He loved his family, his family at RCS and his colleagues by being supportive, encouraging and gracious. And although he was not one to go about professing his Faith; He loved God. He lived his Faith having a ""good heart"", by being authentically and uniquely who God created him to be. His prayer during the last 21 months was based on Romans 8:28, but also expanding beyond God's assurance to believers but also to non-believers. His prayer and desire was that everyone he knew and loved and came in contact with during our final journey would see God in the midst of his time of struggle. That, our words, attitudes and behavior would reflect Christ in us. My first Gift to Patrick as his wife was to sing to him, as a part of our wedding ceremony, I sang to him ""Whither Thou Goest I Will Go"" My Final Gift to Patrick is to share his heart and desire for all of us left behind. To be ""Forever Young"", Moving towards a relationship with God Or Continually growing and deepening our relationship with God. Patrick's Visitation will be held Tuesday January 21 from 12:00-12:30. His service will be held at 12:30 that same day. Both will be located at Horan and McConaty Family Chapel, 3101 South Wadsworth Boulevard, Lakewood, CO. Please share yours memories of Patrick and condolences with the family by signing the guest book below.